I Save You
by Aenigmatis
Summary: Post Chosen, but in a happy way. If I say more then it would give away the ending. Please give it a try and let me know what you think. Spuffy.


Title: I Save You

Classification: Romance/A little Angst

Rating: PG

Summary: Post Chosen, but in a happy way. If I say more then it would give away the ending. Spuffy.

My breath comes in ragged gasps, causing my whole body to heave with the action. My head and heart are racing so that the only real sounds I can deduce are my haggard breaths and racing pulse. My eyes begin to focus to show my dark bedroom. Only shadows and my own inner demons surround me, but I see ghosts from my past. All of my senses are still partially captivated by my subconscious.

It happened again. I don't know why I'm surprised. Willow said it was just my grief manifesting itself and that they would go away with time. Not really sure what she meant by all of her explanation, but either way, I don't believe her. It happens each time I sleep. The beginning and the end are always the same, always. There is something in the middle though, something small but significant, that's different each time.

The phone on my bedside table rings, startling me. I turn my head to look at my clock. How dare someone interrupt my musings at 4:00 am. The thought occurs to me that I hope that didn't qualify as brooding- I'd never live that one down. Oh well, I figure it must be important, so I pick up the handset.

"Hello."

"Buffy?"

"Yes, Andrew, now what is it? It is kind of early, you know."

"Yeah, and I'm sorry, but I couldn't stand it anymore."

"Couldn't stand what Andrew? I need details, or I'm going back to bed."

"See, I promised not to tell you, and I wasn't going to tell you. Even though I thought you would want to know. Cause you know me- I don't tell things I promise not to. And I promised, you know."

"No, Andrew, I don't know, but I will if you spit it out already."

"Now, don't get mad at me for this, 'cause I promised him I wouldn't tell you."

"Andrew!"

"When I was in LA to pick up Dana, I saw him, alive. Well, not really alive, but not dead-dead either."

"Andrew, I'm gonna ask you this one time, and if you don't answer me with a clear response, you will find out that the Hellmouth hath no fury like a Slayer pissed off. Now, who told you not to tell me you saw him?"

"Spike."

I drop the phone back onto the cradle. No bye, no thanks, just the thud and an open line. I guess Andrew got the message.

Spike, my Spike, my William, alive. It has to be the truth 'cause there's no reason for Andrew to lie. But if it's true, why wouldn't he come find me, and why wouldn't he want me to know he wasn't gone?

I should feel hurt. I should feel angry. I should feel a lot of things, all emotions that the old Buffy would feel, but I'm not that Buffy. I've evolved into a better person because of him, because of his love for me. The old Buffy would be stubborn and wait for him to come to her, but I'm done waiting. Spike may have forever ahead of him, but I don't.

I pick up the phone and dial Willow. She handles all of our finances now, so she has to be the one to book my flight. That and I just want to talk to my oldest friend right now.

"Hello, Willow here."

"Sorry about what time it is, Will, but I need you to book me a flight to LA."

"You need a what to where for how come Buffy?"

"I need a ticket to LA on the next available flight, preferably this morning."

"Okay, got it. Now why?"

"I have to go collect my vampire."

"Huh?"

"He's alive."

I get out of the cab after paying the driver and look up at the building I've been brought to. Wolfram and Hart is a cold, emotionless tower of concrete and glass, but still, I can feel it. After all the long months, the radar is still with me. I can feel him moving in the building.

I step closer to the front door, and I can feel an energy wash over me like a giant psychic scanner. I walk through the door, and though I can hear an alarm sounding 'Slayer intrusion' (talk about rude much), I can sense the many guards coming to meet me. Then it hits me like a brick wall, my internal radar, and I know Spike is coming with them.

A group of heavily armed men surround me. Sure, I could fight my way out if I had to, and by the looks on their faces, they recognize me and know it, too. I scan the crowd and my eyes fall on Angel. Huh, I didn't even register he was anywhere around. Guess things really do change.

Then I see him. Well, not actually him, but there's a bleach-blonde head trying to make its way through to the front, and I know it's my Spike. On the periphery, I know Angel is talking to me, but what he says I have no idea about. I push my way through the men until I stand only inches away and can look right into the loving blue eyes I have missed so much. We both smile involuntarily, feeling the need to as desperately as breathing. Well, at least how breathing is for me. Oh whatever, I knew what I meant. Being near him has always had this effect on my mind, so why should I be shocked now?

I make my face blank because if I don't, my next actions will lose their effect. I smack him on the back of the head.

"That's for not believing me." I smack him again. "That's for not telling me you were back. And this is for being the man I love." I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him. I put all of my love for him into it, and he returns feelings of his own.

I pull back to catch my breath and lay my head on his shoulder. "Can we go talk? There's so much I want to tell you."

"Sure, pet, anything you want."

We're sitting in Angel's office, facing each other, him in a chair, me perched on the edge of the desk. We need to get some of this special glass put in back home. The harmless sunlight suits his face almost as well as moonlight.

I've told him about what me and the rest of the gang have been up to and about how much we all missed him, especially Dawn and I. Spike has told me what has happened since he got back and why he didn't come after me. I understand. I'm not happy about it, but I do understand.

Now comes the part I'm kind of apprehensive about. I practiced on the plane, so hopefully this will come out right. I tell him not to interrupt me or I might not make it through it, and after, he nods his head and tilts it, showing he's paying attention. I begin.

"I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again, do something different. Faster, or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways. Every night I save you."

I see the recognition in his face and can feel the awe rolling off of him in waves. I can tell he knows, he believes, he accepts that I truly love him. Both of our eyes are filled with unshed tears.  
  
I move from the desk into the safe haven of Spike's lap, and his strong arms encircle me. We are content with just staying like that. No words are needed, only the presence of one another is. We feel loved, we feel safe, and we feel each other because we do what we've always done. We save each other.


End file.
